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Only in America
1.
Only in America can a pizza get to your house faster
than an ambulance.
2. Only in America are there handicap parking places in
front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America do drugstores make the sick walk all
the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions
while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America do people order double
cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America do banks leave both doors open and
then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America do we leave cars worth thousands of
dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the
garage.
7. Only in America do we use answering machines to
screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a
call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first
place.
8. Only in America do we buy hot dogs in packages of
ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America do we use the word 'politics' to
describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many'
and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
10. Only in America do they have drive-up ATM machines
with Braille lettering.
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