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Training > AVKO Workshops >
Mouth Control or
Get Outta My Face! Get Off My Case!

See also the book, Get Outta My Face! Get Off My Case!

Speaker:  Don McCabe, Noted Author of To Teach a Dyslexic and The Patterns of English Spelling


Participants will learn how to help students acquire new patterns of speech that will help them avoid violent confrontations and help them develop self-confidence and self-esteem.

  • Hypothesis in Academic Jargon

    • Emotional states trigger specific and predictable speech patterns (verbal and non-verbal) that are developed over time.  These speech patterns in turn trigger the specific emotional or mental states associated with them.  Too frequently, these states and behaviors interfere with learning and create unwanted and unnecessary disturbances.

    • To the extent that a person is in control of his emotional state, he is in control of his language.

    • To the extent that a person is in control of his language, he is in control of his emotional state.

    • The way a person chooses to dress is a reflection of a behavioral mode.


  • Hypothesis in plain English

    • The way you feel helps make you say what you say and the way you say it. What you say and the way you say it helps determine the way you feel.

    • If you can keep your cool, you can control what you say.

    • If you control what you say, you can keep your cool.

    • The clothing you wear is a form of an ongoing statement from black trench coats and gang colors to student uniforms.


  • Body Language

    • Tone of voice--It may not be what you say, but HOW you say it.

    • Facial expressions that affect you feel and how those around you react to you

    • Body postures that affect how you feel and how those around you react to you.

    • The way you wear your clothes can affect how you feel and how those around you react to you. 


  • The Different Kinds of Speech Patterns
    The verbal can be described here; the non-verbal can only be demonstrated in a workshop.

    • Attention Grabbers.
      • Negative:  Hey, Man!  or Hey, Boy! or Hey, Girl!  or Hey, You!  
      • Positive:  Excuse me,
    • Names
      • Negative:  Jones
      • Positive:  Mr. Jones
    • Demands vs. Requests
      • Negative:  You gotta.....
      • Positive:  Would you mind...
    • Making it emphatic
      • Negative:  Cuss Words
      • Positive:  Slow, deliberate tempo
    • No way, Jose.
      • Negative:  Like hell, you say.
      • Positive:  You have a point, but...
    • Don't interrupt me/Let me finish.
      • Negative:  Shut up.....
      • Positive:  Just one moment, and I'll get back with you...I
    • Yeah, I'm listening, keep talking.
      • Negative:  Yeah, man I hear you.
      • Positive:  You're right about that.
    • Defend/Attack
      • Negative:  Why are you always.....?
      • Positive:  I have a hard time understanding you when you....
    • Name Calling
      • Negative:  Expletive deleted.
      • Positive:   Still searching for a single example.
    • This is the way it is, I can't be wrong.
      • Negative:   I never...... or you never said...
      • Positive:  I don't recall....

See also: Workshop Recordings

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